CAP Talk

General Discussion => The Lobby => Topic started by: lordmonar on April 01, 2016, 04:35:08 PM

Title: Just Announced
Post by: lordmonar on April 01, 2016, 04:35:08 PM
From my Wing Commander

QuoteNATIONAL HEADQUARTERS CIVILIAN AIR PATROL
DDR Section 16
Maxwell Army Air Corps Base
Montgomery Alabama
1 April 2016

TO THE MEMBERS:

As all members of the Civil Air patrol are aware, Drug Demand Reduction is a large focus of what we do as members of this great organization. In the past we have successfully removed high energy drinks and other similar substances from all activities involving cadets. Studies have shown these horrid drinks to be detrimental to the health and well-being of our youth, and we have banned them from the cadet program.
It's time to take the next big step. The complete and total elimination of caffeinated drinks from CAP activities.......
Studies show that caffeine usage to stay awake, tolerate cadets, and put up with higher ranking officers is not a good solution to the problem when counseling and other alternative means are available. The increase in blood pressure from these drinks exceeds the amount needed to actually just deal with the situation. This leads to an increase in heart rate, clogged arteries, and is just a bad thing all the way around. The Spaatz Association is leading the campaign on this effort stating "If we can put up with Senior Members during our Banquet, they should learn to put up with us without caffeine."
Imagine the impact that is has on our youth when Senior Members stop at service stations and convenience stores to load up on coffee. What's more several of these locations sell abominations of coffee that no more resemble coffee than water does! Ordering a $35.00 triple latte double caffeine chocolate with triple cream and sugar and a cherry on top is just nuts. On top of the fact that it demonstrates poor fiscal management. Soda's containing caffeine, coffee, tea, chocolate, High Energy Drinks, and any other form of caffeine is now banned from all CAP activities by all members. There are non-caffeinated versions of these drinks available.
In addition we expect to see a reduction in vehicle maintenance costs as drivers get over their caffeine addition, there should be less shacking of the steering wheel thus reducing the amount of wear on tires. This is expected to also reduce the need for barf bags during long trips.
On line courses such as "Surviving Encampment without coffee", "Driving under the influence of Water", and "How to maintain your cool without caffeine" and "Self Control – Yuban" are available on the e-services Online Training Site as of this morning. Anyone attaining a perfect score will be turned over to the Inspector General for investigation since it will be considered Prima Fascia evidence that you drank caffeinated coffee during the course. Our own Chaplain Corps has agreed to be available to assist members suffering from withdrawal symptoms of this vicious addition, as soon as they have undergone treatment themselves so they can stand to talk to other members again.

Sincerely,

//SIGNED// Major Maxwell Folgers, CAP
DDR Commander
Title: Re: Just Announded
Post by: stillamarine on April 01, 2016, 04:37:41 PM
 ;) :clap:
Title: Re: Just Announded
Post by: MHC5096 on April 01, 2016, 04:37:47 PM
He has a good sense of humor.  ;)
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: SkywalkerRA on April 01, 2016, 05:34:10 PM
I believe this was an initiative pioneered, in part, by Major Sanka as well?
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: Chappie on April 01, 2016, 05:34:24 PM
Thank goodness that this was a April Fool's joke otherwise I would have lost my Mission Coffee Officer's rating -- which I highly value :)
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: Майор Хаткевич on April 01, 2016, 05:54:47 PM
Quote from: Chappie on April 01, 2016, 05:34:24 PM
Thank goodness that this was a April Fool's joke otherwise I would have lost my Mission Coffee Officer's rating -- which I highly value :)


You can take our uniforms, our planes, our grade, but for the love of everything CAP Senior Membership stands for, don't touch the coffee!
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: Garibaldi on April 01, 2016, 06:19:09 PM
Quote from: Capt Hatkevich on April 01, 2016, 05:54:47 PM
Quote from: Chappie on April 01, 2016, 05:34:24 PM
Thank goodness that this was a April Fool's joke otherwise I would have lost my Mission Coffee Officer's rating -- which I highly value :)


You can take our uniforms, our planes, our grade, but for the love of everything CAP Senior Membership stands for, don't touch the coffee!

Or donuts.
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: Майор Хаткевич on April 01, 2016, 06:23:01 PM
Quote from: Garibaldi on April 01, 2016, 06:19:09 PM
Quote from: Capt Hatkevich on April 01, 2016, 05:54:47 PM
Quote from: Chappie on April 01, 2016, 05:34:24 PM
Thank goodness that this was a April Fool's joke otherwise I would have lost my Mission Coffee Officer's rating -- which I highly value :)


You can take our uniforms, our planes, our grade, but for the love of everything CAP Senior Membership stands for, don't touch the coffee!

Or donuts.


To be fair...since cutting out sugar, and now my creme...I'm just about ready to give up this coffee.
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: Chappie on April 01, 2016, 06:37:51 PM
Quote from: Capt Hatkevich on April 01, 2016, 05:54:47 PM
Quote from: Chappie on April 01, 2016, 05:34:24 PM
Thank goodness that this was a April Fool's joke otherwise I would have lost my Mission Coffee Officer's rating -- which I highly value :)


You can take our uniforms, our planes, our grade, but for the love of everything CAP Senior Membership stands for, don't touch the coffee!

Darn Straight, Skippy!!!
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: Chappie on April 01, 2016, 06:42:54 PM
Quote from: Capt Hatkevich on April 01, 2016, 06:23:01 PM
Quote from: Garibaldi on April 01, 2016, 06:19:09 PM
Quote from: Capt Hatkevich on April 01, 2016, 05:54:47 PM
Quote from: Chappie on April 01, 2016, 05:34:24 PM
Thank goodness that this was a April Fool's joke otherwise I would have lost my Mission Coffee Officer's rating -- which I highly value :)


You can take our uniforms, our planes, our grade, but for the love of everything CAP Senior Membership stands for, don't touch the coffee!

Or donuts.


To be fair...since cutting out sugar, and now my creme...I'm just about ready to give up this coffee.

What????  How could you defile the sacred cup of java with abhorrent ingredients???   No sugar...no cream...no foo-foo blends...man up and drink it as it was meant to be, black (and not that unleaded stuff either)     :)
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: Майор Хаткевич on April 01, 2016, 06:52:38 PM
Quote from: Chappie on April 01, 2016, 06:42:54 PM
Quote from: Capt Hatkevich on April 01, 2016, 06:23:01 PM
Quote from: Garibaldi on April 01, 2016, 06:19:09 PM
Quote from: Capt Hatkevich on April 01, 2016, 05:54:47 PM
Quote from: Chappie on April 01, 2016, 05:34:24 PM
Thank goodness that this was a April Fool's joke otherwise I would have lost my Mission Coffee Officer's rating -- which I highly value :)


You can take our uniforms, our planes, our grade, but for the love of everything CAP Senior Membership stands for, don't touch the coffee!

Or donuts.


To be fair...since cutting out sugar, and now my creme...I'm just about ready to give up this coffee.

What? ???  How could you defile the sacred cup of java with abhorrent ingredients???   No sugar...no cream...no foo-foo blends...man up and drink it as it was meant to be, black (and not that unleaded stuff either)     :)


I'd just rather not. I'll stick to water.
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: Eclipse on April 01, 2016, 07:16:11 PM
Quote from: Capt Hatkevich on April 01, 2016, 06:52:38 PM
I'd just rather not. I'll stick to water.

(http://s8.postimg.org/6ts1bv9xh/BLASPHEMER.jpg)
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: Garibaldi on April 01, 2016, 07:17:58 PM
Quote from: Eclipse on April 01, 2016, 07:16:11 PM
Quote from: Capt Hatkevich on April 01, 2016, 06:52:38 PM
I'd just rather not. I'll stick to water.

(http://s8.postimg.org/6ts1bv9xh/BLASPHEMER.jpg)

DROWN HIM WITH WATER!!!!
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: Майор Хаткевич on April 01, 2016, 07:36:04 PM
Quote from: Garibaldi on April 01, 2016, 07:17:58 PM
Quote from: Eclipse on April 01, 2016, 07:16:11 PM
Quote from: Capt Hatkevich on April 01, 2016, 06:52:38 PM
I'd just rather not. I'll stick to water.

(http://s8.postimg.org/6ts1bv9xh/BLASPHEMER.jpg)

DROWN HIM WITH WATER!!!!


He went the way he lived. Stay thirsty my friends.
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: Chappie on April 01, 2016, 07:40:38 PM
Quote from: Eclipse on April 01, 2016, 07:16:11 PM
Quote from: Capt Hatkevich on April 01, 2016, 06:52:38 PM
I'd just rather not. I'll stick to water.

(http://s8.postimg.org/6ts1bv9xh/BLASPHEMER.jpg)

:clap: :clap: :clap: :clap:
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: Chappie on April 01, 2016, 07:42:05 PM
Quote from: Garibaldi on April 01, 2016, 07:17:58 PM
Quote from: Eclipse on April 01, 2016, 07:16:11 PM
Quote from: Capt Hatkevich on April 01, 2016, 06:52:38 PM
I'd just rather not. I'll stick to water.

(http://s8.postimg.org/6ts1bv9xh/BLASPHEMER.jpg)

DROWN HIM WITH WATER!!!!

Looking through the CAPTalk guidelines to see if there was something I may have missed regarding waterboarding those who are responsible for offending posts,
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: MHC5096 on April 01, 2016, 07:46:25 PM
Black coffee is the ONLY way to go. I've been drinking it that way for the past 28 years.  ;D
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: Chappie on April 01, 2016, 09:39:12 PM
Quote from: lordmonar on April 01, 2016, 04:35:08 PM
From my Wing Commander

QuoteNATIONAL HEADQUARTERS CIVILIAN AIR PATROL
DDR Section 16
Maxwell Army Air Corps Base
Montgomery Alabama
1 April 2016

TO THE MEMBERS:

As all members of the Civil Air patrol are aware, Drug Demand Reduction is a large focus of what we do as members of this great organization. In the past we have successfully removed high energy drinks and other similar substances from all activities involving cadets. Studies have shown these horrid drinks to be detrimental to the health and well-being of our youth, and we have banned them from the cadet program.
It's time to take the next big step. The complete and total elimination of caffeinated drinks from CAP activities.......
Studies show that caffeine usage to stay awake, tolerate cadets, and put up with higher ranking officers is not a good solution to the problem when counseling and other alternative means are available. The increase in blood pressure from these drinks exceeds the amount needed to actually just deal with the situation. This leads to an increase in heart rate, clogged arteries, and is just a bad thing all the way around. The Spaatz Association is leading the campaign on this effort stating "If we can put up with Senior Members during our Banquet, they should learn to put up with us without caffeine."
Imagine the impact that is has on our youth when Senior Members stop at service stations and convenience stores to load up on coffee. What's more several of these locations sell abominations of coffee that no more resemble coffee than water does! Ordering a $35.00 triple latte double caffeine chocolate with triple cream and sugar and a cherry on top is just nuts. On top of the fact that it demonstrates poor fiscal management. Soda's containing caffeine, coffee, tea, chocolate, High Energy Drinks, and any other form of caffeine is now banned from all CAP activities by all members. There are non-caffeinated versions of these drinks available.
In addition we expect to see a reduction in vehicle maintenance costs as drivers get over their caffeine addition, there should be less shacking of the steering wheel thus reducing the amount of wear on tires. This is expected to also reduce the need for barf bags during long trips.
On line courses such as "Surviving Encampment without coffee", "Driving under the influence of Water", and "How to maintain your cool without caffeine" and "Self Control – Yuban" are available on the e-services Online Training Site as of this morning. Anyone attaining a perfect score will be turned over to the Inspector General for investigation since it will be considered Prima Fascia evidence that you drank caffeinated coffee during the course. Our own Chaplain Corps has agreed to be available to assist members suffering from withdrawal symptoms of this vicious addition, as soon as they have undergone treatment themselves so they can stand to talk to other members again.

Sincerely,

//SIGNED// Major Maxwell Folgers, CAP
DDR Commander

And of course, I will be standing by to assist members suffering from withdrawal symptoms -- as soon as my mandatory stay at the Juan Valdez Coffee Rehabilitation Center has been completed (highly unlikely since a couple of us snuck out late last night, highjacked his mule, and made our way to the nearest AM/PM market for a quick cup/fix).
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: Storm Chaser on April 01, 2016, 10:12:07 PM
I would quit CAP before giving up coffee. It was bad enough giving up the sugar in my coffee.
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: Chappie on April 01, 2016, 10:48:00 PM
Quote from: Storm Chaser on April 01, 2016, 10:12:07 PM
I would quit CAP before giving up coffee. It was bad enough giving up the sugar in my coffee.

Sugar in coffee....yuck...that makes it taste like some kind of syrup.
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: RogueLeader on April 02, 2016, 12:11:54 AM
Quote from: Chappie on April 01, 2016, 10:48:00 PM
Quote from: Storm Chaser on April 01, 2016, 10:12:07 PM
I would quit CAP before giving up coffee. It was bad enough giving up the sugar in my coffee.

Sugar in coffee....yuck...that makes it taste like some kind of syrup.

Tasty, magical, life giving syrup.
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: Spam on April 02, 2016, 03:03:23 AM
The spice must flow. The sleeper must awaken.

:o

V/R
Spam

Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: lordmonar on April 02, 2016, 04:11:03 AM
Dune the desert planet.  House Atrades!
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: NIN on April 02, 2016, 10:51:49 AM
" It Is by caffeine alone that I set my mind in motion." ( I can't take credit for that one, one of my co-workers use it the other day )
Title: Just Announced
Post by: Storm Chaser on April 02, 2016, 12:31:49 PM
Quote from: Chappie on April 01, 2016, 10:48:00 PM
Quote from: Storm Chaser on April 01, 2016, 10:12:07 PM
I would quit CAP before giving up coffee. It was bad enough giving up the sugar in my coffee.

Sugar in coffee....yuck...that makes it taste like some kind of syrup.

I'm starting to get use to drinking coffee without sugar, but after so many years doing so, it takes time.
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: FW on April 02, 2016, 12:49:19 PM
Quote from: RogueLeader on April 02, 2016, 12:11:54 AM
Quote from: Chappie on April 01, 2016, 10:48:00 PM
Quote from: Storm Chaser on April 01, 2016, 10:12:07 PM
I would quit CAP before giving up coffee. It was bad enough giving up the sugar in my coffee.

Sugar in coffee....yuck...that makes it taste like some kind of syrup.

Tasty, magical, life giving syrup.

I agree, however I've become addicted to adding Chocolate Creamer to my morning brew.  Bailey's must add something special to their concoction... ;D
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: lordmonar on April 02, 2016, 06:20:27 PM
Okay....I guess I'm one of those commie bastards....but I'm not a coffee fan.  I like my coffee cold, with a lot of sugar, whip cream and caramel added.

Or maybe in shot sized doses in a foreign cafe, preferbly in a combat zone! 

Drinking Cappuccino in Mostar Bosnia Y Herzegovina in full battle rattle is one of my favorite "war" pics.
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: Live2Learn on April 02, 2016, 09:17:22 PM
On initial read I wondered whether the former Mayor of New York City had given up his billion$ and got a job in DDR with CAP.  What a relief!  I can return to the current electioneering news comforted that only one billionaire is front and center before the media spotlight (at the moment).
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: Storm Chaser on April 03, 2016, 01:54:00 AM
Quote from: lordmonar on April 02, 2016, 06:20:27 PM
Okay....I guess I'm one of those commie bastards....but I'm not a coffee fan.  I like my coffee cold, with a lot of sugar, whip cream and caramel added.

Sorry, but that's not coffee; that's a dessert.  ;)
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: Chappie on April 03, 2016, 03:01:20 AM
Quote from: Storm Chaser on April 03, 2016, 01:54:00 AM
Quote from: lordmonar on April 02, 2016, 06:20:27 PM
Okay....I guess I'm one of those commie bastards....but I'm not a coffee fan.  I like my coffee cold, with a lot of sugar, whip cream and caramel added.

Sorry, but that's not coffee; that's a dessert.  ;)

^^^^Exactly
Title: Re: Just Announced
Post by: PHall on April 03, 2016, 03:25:10 AM
I'm sorry, but I' with Chappie here. When I go to Starbucks it's "Coffee, black, Largest size you have."