single parent- cadet

[schreiberboy]

I had a question-
There is a kid in my squadron (I think he's 15) that recently got his girlfriend pregnant (and then his girlfriend broke up with him for some reason..not really my business).  I know there is a rule against marriage for cadets, but is there one for being a single parent?

[mprokosch11]

I had a question-
There is a kid in my squadron (I think he's 15) that recently got his girlfriend pregnant (and then his girlfriend broke up with him for some reason..not really my business).  I know there is a rule against marriage for cadets, but is there one for being a single parent?

Whats the rule with a cadet being a parent?

[MIKE]

Whats the rule with a cadet being a parent?

Knowledgebase link with the answer.

[mprokosch11]

Thanks

[Nathan]

For anyone else who can't get to the link for whatever reason, there USED to be a regulation against it. As far as I know, it's been removed, but there has always been debate over it (and what regulations take presedence over the other). For now, though, the official ruling seems to be "no."

[Matt]

So, moreless to sum up the amendment:

You cannot be forced SM or kicked out for being pregnant (at any age) -- it's not PC to do so.  Same with Marriage prior to 18th birthday.

However, if you are 18 and married, you will be forced SM or be forced out.

[Pylon]

If a cadet is a single parent and continually finds time to better themselves through participation in the CAP Cadet Program, I would like to applaud him or her and wish them the best.   :clap:

...as I hope anybody else in our program would do.

[SarDragon]

Well, as a former single parent (thru divorce), I can say that CAP wasn't very high on my priority list of things to spend time on. School/job and being a parent take up enough time all by themselves w/o getting involved in a time and money hog like CAP. You only get one chance watching your kid grow up.

[Nathan]

Hell, if I became any sort of parent, whether single or otherwise, I would probably take a breather from CAP.

[jimmydeanno]

I know, I know, this is old...but I have something to add.

This situation came up in my "old squadron."  There was a young woman (14) who had 2 children (oldest was 3) and was un-married.  Since the regulation says "pregnant" (the change isn't in the regulation posted) and "married," it made no stipulation to "single" and "already born."  We contacted the national legal office, and were told that, "We can not decide what is moral and immoral in today's society," and were "required" to accept this cadet's membership application.

This leads me to a few points.

1. What is the purpose of the membership board if we are "forced" to accept applications?  One could argue in a "non-discriminatory" way that a 14 year old mother of 2 should be focused on other things than participating in CAP.  Therefore making her a "bad fit" for the organization.

2. In my opinion, this "cadet" had already made some HUGE adult choices.  The limitations put on cadet membership, until recently have all pertained to "adult choices," joining the military, pregnancy, marriage, becoming an adult, etc.

3. As a parent (I'm not one), wouldn't you assume that the place you were sending your child was free of "bad influences?"  A 14 year old with 2 children IMO is not a good example to cadets; both male and female.  Isn't there an expectation that the 'leadership' protect the environment of CAP from such bad influences?

IMO, parents that are cadet aged should not be allowed to participate in the CAP cadet program.  IMO, if they want to be in CAP, they can join at 18 as an adult, since they've already chosen to make adult decisions.

[Sgt. Savage]

I know, I know, this is old...but I have something to add.

This situation came up in my "old squadron."  There was a young woman (14) who had 2 children (oldest was 3) and was un-married.  Since the regulation says "pregnant" (the change isn't in the regulation posted) and "married," it made no stipulation to "single" and "already born."  We contacted the national legal office, and were told that, "We can not decide what is moral and immoral in today's society," and were "required" to accept this cadet's membership application.

This leads me to a few points.

1. What is the purpose of the membership board if we are "forced" to accept applications?  One could argue in a "non-discriminatory" way that a 14 year old mother of 2 should be focused on other things than participating in CAP.  Therefore making her a "bad fit" for the organization.

2. In my opinion, this "cadet" had already made some HUGE adult choices.  The limitations put on cadet membership, until recently have all pertained to "adult choices," joining the military, pregnancy, marriage, becoming an adult, etc.

3. As a parent (I'm not one), wouldn't you assume that the place you were sending your child was free of "bad influences?"  A 14 year old with 2 children IMO is not a good example to cadets; both male and female.  Isn't there an expectation that the 'leadership' protect the environment of CAP from such bad influences?

IMO, parents that are cadet aged should not be allowed to participate in the CAP cadet program.  IMO, if they want to be in CAP, they can join at 18 as an adult, since they've already chosen to make adult decisions.

That's just plain creepy. I wouldn't want to be an SM around a 14 year old mother of 2 type cadet. I can't imagine what it would do to other cadets.

[mikeylikey]

This situation came up in my "old squadron."  There was a young woman (14) who had 2 children (oldest was 3) and was un-married. 

Ummm.....that hints at either "NBC's To Catch a Predator" type stuff OR this girls guardians are way JACKED UP and should be Locked up for the rest of their lives for allowing their PRE-TEEN daughter to get pregnant.  What is this world coming to?

I would never accept a cadet that had kids of their own to join.  If they want to fight me on the issue, I will go to court.  It would be justified that the dues being paid for them to join, would better be served going to the babies to FEED THEM, CLOTH THEM and HOUSE THEM.

[Flying Pig]

A 14 year old girl with 2 kids!?  WOW!  I would say the kid needs to have other priorities.  Id go with Mikey on that one.  This is a good topic though.  My Sq is in downtown  inner city Fresno, so I could see us being faced with this issue. 

Next thing your going to have nursery staff selection at encampements!  Think Im joking?  Wait until you have a cadet who breast feeding and try to keep her from attending!  I dont want my children, my cadets sitting in classs with a cadet who has a car seat next to her/him.  Sorry, we'll direct you to an organization that can better suit you.

[jimmydeanno]

Have any of you ever run into the people that think the CAP cadet program is a troubled youth organization?  Or how about the parents that think by sending their child to encampment will "turn their child around?"

I believe that these parents were looking for a "solution" to their problem. Fortunately in our case, the girl submitted her application, came to one meeting, and left.  I will honestly say, that I did not actively try to retain her membership on purpose. I believe there are more appropriate organizations that are able to handle such situations.

I also felt it was my obligation to all the parents and cadets in the squadron to promote an atmosphere of good decision making and responsibility.  I felt it was my responsibility to make sure that all of the cadets, while at my squadron, were not subjected to the bad influence that this girl could be.  What does it say to the other female cadets in the squadron?  What type of distraction would it be to the normal squadron routine?


We do not allow cadets of opposite sex to be alone in a room together just for the appearance of inpropriety and the image that it portrays.  Why do we take this stance and not disallow those who have already proven that they will particpate in the actions that we are trying to avoid?

What type of image does it give CAP to have a cadet in uniform carrying around a newborn child?  Is this the image that CAP wants to portray?  This is not discrimination as defined by our "non-discrimination policy."

It is Civil Air Patrol policy that no applicant meeting CAP's minimum age requirement will be denied membership in CAP on the basis of race, sex, age, color, religion, national origin, or disability (formerly handicap).

[LTC_Gadget]

Have any of you ever run into the people that think the CAP cadet program is a troubled youth organization?  Or how about the parents that think by sending their child to encampment will "turn their child around?"or, religion, national origin, or disability (formerly handicap).

Yes, I have.  Several years ago, I had a regular wave of single mothers wanting to bring their boys/girls in to "turn them around" or "make them mind" etc.  As politely as I could muster, I told them that we weren't 'Big Brothers/Sisters,' a substitute military school,  or any kind of a social services agency.  I told them that if their son/daughter didn't really want to be there, that we didn't want them to be there, as it took away from the program for the young people that *did* want to be there, participate and advance. 

I've often said that as much as I love CAP, and as much as I think of it and most of its people, it's definitely *not* an organization to which everyone should belong.  The trick, I suppose, is finding the occasional unpolished sapphire.. I don't think I consciously know how to do that.

V/R,

[DNall]

Dependants/marriage could be disqualifying for military serivce, and in some sense represent immoral behavior. That was the original intent to the reg, it was changed causse corporate is scared sideways of lawyers.

[lordmonar]

Let me just say a couple of things about this issue.

First....who are we to say what a person should be focusing their time and money on?  We are not in possession of all the facts.

Second....when having a membership board we should only be looking at the impact the new member has on the unit.  Sure if the cadet has a documented history of violence or drug use....you can say "no...we don't want you"....but an 11-year old getting pregnant (3 years ago) is not a threat to anyone's squadron.

Third...a young parent is or is not a good example for the other cadets.....but maybe CAP (a safe, educational, structured environment) is what this potential cadet needs the most.

Bottom line....we are making judgment calls on a subject we do not have all the facts on.  We assume that this cadet is some sort of slut.....maybe she if a victim of child abuse or rape.  Do we continue to hold her responsible for what someone else did to her a couple of years ago?

[mikeylikey]

Umm...jeez!  Shouldn't call people sluts.  In fact I have all the facts I need.  She got pregnant twice.  She made the same mistake twice from what I read.  We (as in CAP) can absolutely discriminate against this girl. 

[MIKE]

Lock.