CAP and Relationships?

[caphornbuckle]

I met my wife as a cadet, at encampment.  We've been married 10 years.

Same here...17 years in August.

[Майор Хаткевич]

Met my fiancee while in CAP...

[Captain Morgan]

I sleep with my Observer ... we've been married 28 years.

[Private Investigator]

Done deal   :clap:

[BillB]

At a Florida Wing encampment, I took the Cadet PAO and the senior Supply Officer to Georgia (with the encampment commanders approval)and married the Supply Officer. The Cadet PAO shot the photos. The Cadet PAO ended up as a Wing Commander in another Wing. The female cadets at the encampment got so upset that we got married that during the following encampment (two weeks later), Florida ran several summer encampments due to the number of cadets) they threw a full military wedding at the Base Chapel and talked Food Service into wedding cakes and the full ceremoney. Things like that can't be done now-a-days

[The CyBorg is destroyed]

I met my wife of going-on-13-years after a CAP activity.

She didn't join CAP, but I wore my service dress when I married her.  I'd wanted to get mess dress, but no $$$.

[Grumpy]

While me personally, I have a "Hell NO!" on any relationships in CAP, I was wondering how people feel about CAP and relationships, particularly cadet relationships. I personally see CAP relationships has relatively short lived drama filled experiences that turn cadets against eachother and make two peoples business their entire squadrons matter.

My first wife and I met as cadets.  Our weekly squadron meetings met on the same night except mine let out 1/2 Hr before hers so I'd scoot over the hers in time to pick her up and take her home every week.  We were married for 29 wonderful years until I lost her to cancer.  This would have been our 44th year.  I miss her so...

[CharlieMike]

^That made me tear up a little bit...sorry for your loss.

As far as relationships are concerned...my girlfriend and I maintain a very professional environment when we meet at wing events (being we live clear across the state from one and other...that and she out ranks me, as a C/1Lt.) We enjoy the time we get together, and we aren't obvious about it, we aren't very public with it either (I'm only referencing so it's not like "LOL. STUPID CADETS ARE MAKING ASSUMPTIONS AGAIN!"), it's worked for us. Do I recommend it for everyone? Absolutely not. Do you have to be very aware of yourself to keep it professional? Absolutely yes. Is it worth it if you both want it? Certainly. Also...we met at an Encampment as well. Seems to lead to successful relationships, heh.

So I've basically summed up this entire thread while throwing in my two cents. Good eve, all.

[Grumpy]

^That made me tear up a little bit...sorry for your loss.

As far as relationships are concerned...my girlfriend and I maintain a very professional environment when we meet at wing events (being we live clear across the state from one and other...that and she out ranks me, as a C/1Lt.) We enjoy the time we get together, and we aren't obvious about it, we aren't very public with it either (I'm only referencing so it's not like "LOL. STUPID CADETS ARE MAKING ASSUMPTIONS AGAIN!"), it's worked for us. Do I recommend it for everyone? Absolutely not. Do you have to be very aware of yourself to keep it professional? Absolutely yes. Is it worth it if you both want it? Certainly. Also...we met at an Encampment as well. Seems to lead to successful relationships, heh.

So I've basically summed up this entire thread while throwing in my two cents. Good eve, all.

Nice comment.  You hit the nail on the head.  "Keep it professional"

[41839j]

This is just one of those things that kids have to learn on their own.  We can tell them not to do it because if something goes wrong, then your involvement in CAP will suffer.  (if you are interested in a girl at CAP, ask her out and then the relationship goes sour, then those CAP meetiings get pretty awkward.  If you like CAP, you might regret this.)  Some have the maturity to keep it professional, but most probably don't.

I remember those feelings as a young teen.  There is not much we can tell them about this that will sink in when those kinds of feelings are stirred up.  They just have to learn how to deal with this.  It is part of growing up.

Glad to hear that it worked out for some.  I also broke one of the cardinal rules of no dating with people at the place of employment.  It worked out for us and we have been married 17 years.  We don't work together on the job anymore however.

Best thing to do is probably officially discourage but not forbid this kind of thing, and deal with problems as they arrise.

[caphornbuckle]

I think what really helps too is that they not be from the same unit.  This was my experience and it appears to be so with the majority of the others on here as well.

[Garibaldi]

Generally, cadets are socially awkward IMO. All the girls in CAP I "dated" or "went with" WIWAC were from other units, so if something went wrong and we "broke up" we wouldn't have to worry about seeing each other on a regular basis, but when we ran into each other at a Wing activity, it was easy to go our separate ways and avoid seeing or even speaking to each other. We could delude ourselves into believing we were in a real relationship without all the hassles. Kind of like the "I have a girlfriend, but she lives in Canada. You wouldn't know her."

Discouraging this kind of thing is tantamount to telling Barney Stinson to keep it in his pants. He'd just say "Challenge accepted".